Ep. 37: Jason Wasser on the Work From Your Happy Place Podcast

In this episode I am a guest on the Work From Your Happy Place Podcast with Belinda Ellsworth who aims to not only provide the confidence to design and live the life of your dreams, but also specific ideas and resources so you can keep living it!

In this episode I discuss:

• My background story and why I became a therapist
• that kids these days have way more knowledge then previous generations at the same age
• why asking a kid what are the 50,000 things you want to do with your life vs what's the one thing you want to do is beneficial
• my passion and love for Neuro Emotional Technique (NET) that fast tracks emotional and physical healing
• how I am coaching entrepreneurs and family businesses in office and online
• my process from therapist/healer to entrepreneur 
• the history of my grandfather surviving Nazi Germany to open what is now our 3rd generation family furniture business
• why you need to listen to your friends to push you in the right direction
• why everyone needs a therapist/coach in their life
• why rhythms and rituals are important to be successful on a daily basis
• how person growth has become a waterdowned buzzword 
• why I turn down client that don't meet my Doorman Principles based on the book Who's In Your Room

and so much more!

Learn more about Business Finishing School and Rick Sapio http://bit.ly/Bfsgrowth
Buy the book Who's In Your Room https://amzn.to/2Urril5

Jason can be reached for online therapy and coaching, alternative medicine and speaking engagements at www.thefamilyroomsfl.com.
Reach out to him to set up a free consultations to tackle your goals.
(954) 324-3677
jason@thefamilyroomsfl.com
Follow us on Instagram:https://www.instagram.com/youwinninglife

Transcript

Speaker 1: 0:00

This is the You Winning Life Podcast, your number one source for mastering of positive existence. Each episode will be interviewing exceptional people, giving you empowering insights and guiding you to extraordinary outcomes. Learn from specialists in the worlds of integrative and natural wellness, spirituality, psychology, and entrepreneurship. So you too can be winning life. Now here's your host, licensed marriage and family therapist, certified neuro emotional technique practitioner and certified entrepreneur coach Jason Wasser.

Speaker 2: 0:37

It is my pleasure to be here hanging out with you. Thanks for having

Speaker 3: 0:40

Oh, fun. Well, we're gonna get into some really good fun topics today, but why don't you just take a moment and kind of tell everybody a little bit more about yourself and about more about that journey, like how did you get to this place today? And then we'll get into a little bit more about what you do with your business today as well.

Speaker 2: 0:58

Absolutely. So if I were to reverse engineer this story, the reason why I exist as a practitioner is to bring people health, hope, and happiness and to optimize the human potential. And everything goes back to everybody's personal story. We've all have been through personal life challenges that no matter what someone's background is, there's stuff that we have to accomplish and stuff we have to work on. So I grew up in a, down here in South Florida and a really, you know, average family and like average families, we go through divorce. Uh, my parents went through divorce when I was starting in middle school and ending up after, uh, you know, the end of my high school took that significant period of time for that to get dealt with. And meanwhile, right, I'm dealing with compensating as a high school kid. What's going on with my family? What's going on in my life? Who am I, what's my purpose? What's my potential? Which left me to a lot of wandering and journeying. Um, spending some time in Israel after high school and doing a spiritual journey, coming back and working with youth groups and youth departments and programming both in high school, middle school and college campuses. Uh, which made me realize that I'm already doing therapy in an informal way. Why don't I just go ahead, get licensed and actually call myself a therapist? Um, and that led me to integrate a lot of the things that I'm now doing, which is working with kids, couples and families, and now young professionals and entrepreneurs and their businesses to help maximize their potential while minimizing their stressors.

Speaker 3: 2:25

That sounds fantastic. That was a great way to explain all of that, so that's awesome. Thanks. I think that it is, uh, a tough time to be going through, um, all of those changes when you're in that middle school to high school period of time. It's just a really tough, because you're discovering things about your own self and what you thought was true isn't, and I, I just find that to be, um, that is when I went through my divorce and my kids were of that age and I just did a lot of reading up on it. And it is, um, it is, is a tough time because of all the things you're discovering about yourself and your your own, um, feelings about relationships and, and everything else that exists.

Speaker 2: 3:04

Right. And especially with today's technology where we don't give it enough credit that the kids who are, you know, that elementary, middle school, high school age have radical more knowledge on a data side than we ever did collectively in most people's lives. So they're fast tracking an experience where they think they know all this information, but their emotional and intellectual experiences don't line up for that. So one of the things that I love doing, especially for teenagers, is not just talking about what's life like, what do you want to accomplish as far as a career, which I think is one of the worst questions you can ask a teenager. What do you wanna do for the rest of your life as opposed to what are the 50,000 different things you wanna do for the rest of your life, is also finding a way to sync the emotionality with their, uh, data knowledge that they've gotten through, you know, what we call the technology of the internet.

Speaker 3: 3:52

Right. That's a really good point. So tell us a little bit about your business today and then how has that shaped your lifestyle today?

Speaker 2: 4:00

Sure. So I have a full service mind body integrative wellness practice here in Fort Lauderdale. What that means is that it started off as a traditional therapy practice and as I journeyed further into what I like to call the down the rabbit hole healing modalities, uh, that are clinically researched and journal published such as neuro emotional technique, the philosophy of my personal life as well as my practice has expanded radically. So now on staff, I have an accu uh, sorry, sorry. On staff. Now I have a chiropractor on staff. I have a nutritionist. Um, I do not only traditional therapy, but I also do this mind body technique, n e t neuro emotional technique. I do other modalities that incorporate neurological muscle testing for nutrition and toxins. That helps the emotional mindset, not just biochemistry wise with nutrition, but also how you feel with your motivation and your anxiety and your stress to look at the whole body. As well as I have a built up, um, practice in addition to this where I'm doing coaching both in person and online with entrepreneurs, uh, both in their business as well as with their life outside of their business.

Speaker 3: 5:08

Wow, that's great. Um, so what do you think or have you identified what you think two of your greatest skill sets are that have really helped you, um, with this journey or owning your own business, trying new things, all, all of the things that are required of an entrepreneur

Speaker 2: 5:25

<laugh>? Yeah, so I think that's, that, that question can be answered by telling you where I was at a few years ago where my definition of being in business was that I'm a therapist and a healer, not an entrepreneur. And, um, I come from a third generation family furniture business. My grandfather survived, uh, the Nazi Holocaust and after he moved from Poland to America, opened up a furniture business in Pennsylvania and it eventually moved down here to South Florida where my dad took over. And now my younger siblings, my brother and sister are running the business full-time. And I never really saw myself in that world being more of that people person from a different perspective, right? Sales is still, you have to be a hundred percent a people person, but I was more of that emotional side and self-development side, and I never saw myself as a businessman. And that definition never really felt authentic to me until a buddy of mine tried to convince me for almost two years to come to a program called Business Finishing School in Dallas, Texas. And it freaked me out because the word business and entrepreneur was something that was not part of my lexicon once I got there. And I heard, um, the definition of what they deem as an entrepreneur, which according to Rick Sapio, who's a capital adventurist, uh, billionaire who created this program said, an entrepreneur is someone who defines their core values and then holds themself accountable to making decisions from those core values. And I'm like, well, I have values. I want to have compassion and self-awareness and personal growth as part of what I do, both as a person and as a professional. And that's what I want my clients to get. So I guess I'm an entrepreneur from that point. I went through this program, I was offered to become a coach under Rick with a handful of other practitioners in the program. Um, and I think that two things that came out of that is, one, everybody needs a coach in their life no matter where they are, where they're sitting, no matter what stage of their career, career that everybody needs. Someone who's not seeing them from inside the frame that I can see you from an outside perspective and look at patterns. So that's number one. Everybody I think needs a coach in their life. And number two is that if you are not making equal investments into your personal development through therapy, through coaching, through workshops, through seminars, you're missing out on a huge chunk of your potential.

Speaker 3: 7:42

Wow. So what do you think has helped you to sort of stay the course, if you will?

Speaker 2: 7:50

So I think one of the things that are most essential for someone like me who is naturally a d d even without the diagnosis, is having rhythms and rituals in your life. So for example, if someone says they want to accomplish a goal, Mike, a challenge to them would be, let's reverse engineer the action steps and the plan to make that happen, and then let's plug that into your calendar as a priority. So that's one big massive step, right? To make that very clear in your life. The second part of that would be to be the accountability part. Who do you have in your life outside of you that's holding you accountable to those goals? So one, I'm part of an accountability group for, uh, through this program, through business finishing school. And number two, I am that person for many of my clients, both my therapy clients and my coaching clients in the businesses to hold them accountable to specific obtainable goals that are gonna take them to the next level in order for them to reach that, what they wanna accomplish.

Speaker 3: 8:48

Great. I think accountability is everybody's looking for that, really, whether they wanna admit it or not, I think everybody needs that and they need to find the best ways for themselves, whether that's through a coach or what other kind of triggers can they do to create their own accountability, whether that's a system or a, the a planner or whatever kinds of habitual things. And I think I, I would agree with you, creating good habit patterns that you can learn to be repetitive in are are very good for helping you create that accountability as well.

Speaker 2: 9:21

Right. And I think one that people are afraid of that rhythm and ritual, what they would call would, they're afraid would become too mundane. My life will become mundane. I won't have enough creativity or enough wiggle room or enough free time. But research actually shows that when you create a long-term goal, and I'm not talking about a month, three month, but when you reverse engineer a goal of what do I want my life to look like 10 years from now mm-hmm.<affirmative> 15 years from now, 20 years from now, that people are too short-sighted on outcomes in their life, and then the things that they're doing on a daily basis will either sync up with them getting to that goal or they're not. And you'll be like, wow, am I in the right job? Am I in the right relationship? Am I parenting the right way? Am I spending my money the right way? Because then you really look at, like, if you do a long-term plan, you say, in my career I wanna be making 2 50, 300, 400,000, or you're at a$20,000,$30,000 a year job and you wanna make 70, what do you need to do to make that next jump up? And people then need to figure out, who can I be coached by to say they're doing this? What are they doing to get that level? And I just have to easily life hack that. I don't have to reinvent the wheel. Right? So I want to challenge people out there to look at the long-term thing and are you plugging in what you need to do on a daily basis in order to get accomplished that what you need to do? And who's out there doing that and just copy them. This is, thank God for the internet, you can do that.

Speaker 3: 10:44

Absolutely. Absolutely. So let's talk about, um, one of your most outstanding accomplishments or something that's, that you've achieved that's super meaningful for you.

Speaker 2: 10:53

Sure. So I would have to say personal development in that category over the last many years has been such a high priority for me, that you would hope that as a therapist and as a coach, that that would be, and what I'm finding, there's a lot of big talk in everybody's arena, especially now with this social media entrepreneur. Um, or that personal growth in spirituality has become such a mundane buzzword that it loses its touch. But I I, I joke around with my clients when they say, well, what are your rates? I say, before I tell you my rates, let me tell you that I guarantee you're not gonna find another therapist and coach who spends as much money on personal development as I do that I'm able to bring that back into the value that I'm bringing you so you're not just paying me for the time I'm spending with you, but you're spending, you're, you're paying for me to go out and distill all this information to bring it back to you so I can help you exponentially more than the average person can. So I think that my contribution, one to MINDBODY Spirit Health, whether it's acupuncture, yoga retreats, right? Uh, whether, uh, my personal development doing this business finishing school program, um, really getting coached by the right people who are not playing the game at the level I am, but that are exponentially 10 15 x more successfully than me and spending my time, effort, and money to get in front of them has been an a really incredible investment.

Speaker 3: 12:19

That's great. So opposite of that, what's an obstacle or challenge that you faced? And I'd love a story. So, and then how did you work through that?

Speaker 2: 12:29

So I think that as I've been on this journey, one of my favorite techniques and tools, uh, that my coach Rick Sapio talks about is the doorman principal and Rick and, uh, Dr. Ivan Meisner, who's the founder of B Nni, wrote a book called Who's in Your Room, which I highly recommend that everybody out there get. Um, and one of the things I talk about is this doorman principal is kind of like if you have a restaurant or a nightclub, who do you let in determines the, the success of your business? But a lot of people aren't doing that both in their professional and especially their personal life. So as I started learning this experience of, well, I'm Jason the therapist who wants to help everybody, I realize that I was seeing clients that are just not my niche and ones that I'm just not really good at helping. And on top of that, I was just burnt out and I was not looking forward to seeing them. So once I gave myself permission to have a doorman principle and I established the core values of my practice, I established what type of modalities that a client has to be okay with working, like my mind body modalities, that if they're not looking for that or they're not open to that, I'm not gonna take'em on as a client. Cuz that's what I do and that's what I'm an expert at. So I can't offer them my best version of myself if they're hold allow saying, nope, I want you to see me and hold one arm behind your back. So as I was doing this journey, I started creating a list of personal values of people that I wanted in my social life circles. And I'm very friendly, I'll talk to anybody on the street, but I had a person who was in my life who had a somewhat of a sketchy reputation, has a heart of gold, but when it came to relationships and dating their level of values was very different than mine. And when I realized that people were saying so-and-so is a good friend of of Jason's, I was wondering if they would also say, well, if so-and-so is acting that way in relationships, does Jason also act that way in relationships just because of association of our friendship? And when I sat down to have a talk with that person and say, listen, I love you, but I can't be friends with you at this level anymore. I will see you socially. I'll say hi to you, I'll give you a hug. But we are, are, are because of these values that are different. I can't be associated with this cuz it, it will ruin both my personal and professional reputation that that was a really big shift for me. And he got off and you're judgmental, you're critical, you don't even know what's happening. And I had to say back to this person, reputation goes a long, long way and you only get a shot of a reputation once, and I know yours is burned in the community and I don't want mine to be burned. And that was it. So, and I know years later that rep, that person's reputation continued. Um, and now when people ask me, weren't you, aren't you friends with so-and-so? I said, I used to be, but our core values no longer aligned. So I had to end that friendship and I made that a really clear line in the sand.

Speaker 3: 15:14

Wow. And that those are, those are hard choices, but sometimes necessary ones. Right?

Speaker 2: 15:19

Right. And, and when I share this idea, when I'm doing my workshops and seminars about helping people create their core values so they can have a life of simplicity and getting the outcomes that they desire, I find that most people are still afraid of hurting someone else's feelings than living in their own truth. And that's where they need someone like a good therapist and a good coach to help them get really clear on that. Because if you are making choices about who you're going out with, who your business partners with, who you're hanging out with, socially, financially, who you're investing with, and it doesn't align with your core values, you're only gonna be detrimental to your long-term success, health and happiness.

Speaker 3: 15:55

Great. So that leads us to our next question, which is a big one in part of the show. And that is, what does working from your happy place mean to you?

Speaker 2: 16:04

So if we took everything and tied that all together Yeah. Right. Core values, identifying that, helping my clients identify that, really asking the questions of what would it be like if none of these things were a problem anymore and you were living in complete alignment with who you are is the same questions that I ask myself. What do I want my schedule to look like? What do I want my spirituality look like? What do I want my health to look like? And then I go and I connect with the people that I know are doing that. So again, like I said, I can life hack that mm-hmm.<affirmative>. Um, and my podcast actually has come out as, as a, as a result of that because I get to hang out and interview like you are people who are doing the things that I love doing, that I've become friends with through my network and now sharing and distilling that information to the people that are in my community or becoming part of my community. Great. So my, so my happy place will be that when I'm hanging out consistently with like-minded individuals who are connected or I would even daresay obsessed with personal development, with being a really good person. And I joke with my clients, I don't care where you pray and I don't care if you sleep who you sleep with and I don't care who you sleep with while you're praying, just be a good person and I'm happy to hang out with you

Speaker 3: 17:17

<laugh>. That's wonderful. So what's the name of your podcast? Why we're on that topic?

Speaker 2: 17:23

Yeah, so my podcast is called You Winning Life and I determine based on my own personal development that four domains in my world have contributed to my radical success. And I thought that would be where I could be helpful and serve people out there powerfully would be in the world of psychology and mindset, alternative and integrative medicine slash wellness spirituality. And when people say, well spirituality, what do you mean? I'm like, well what does spirituality mean to you and entrepreneurship? And those are the four domains that my podcast tackles and I, you know, either share some mindset stuff or I interview, like I said, people that are in my network or people that I want to be in my network to leverage that wealth and wisdom so that people out there who don't have, you know, either the resources or no, they can have those resources to distill that down for everybody to be as successful as as everybody else out there. Because if you just do everything consistency with accountability and goals and rhythms and rituals and core values, you can get these same outcomes. And that's what I really want to share and invest into with everybody who's out there in that community.

Speaker 3: 18:30

Perfect. That is perfect. So what advice would you give to those wanting to be entrepreneurs?

Speaker 2: 18:38

So first step, I'm gonna, I'm gonna keep bashing it over and over again, is define your core values instead of deciding what you want to do, what's the business you want in first? No. If you know your core values you and then figure out what are the 20, 30, 40 different opportunities that align with those core values. No matter what you do, you can't go wrong cuz you'll never be breaking your own true authenticity in that regards. The second step is what's the problem you wanna solve? There's gonna be a lot bigger buy-in if you realize that there's something that I know personally that I was put in the world to do and if I have a meaningful connection to solving this, you'll have a lot more success. Waking up in the morning and going to bed at night when things are tough, cuz it's not gonna be easier than working a nine to five for someone else. It's not the rise in grind and just lose your mind. I don't recommend that either. But it's really finding the buy-in of why you believe that you were put on this earth to help solve and make this world a better place and have a purpose in connection with that.

Speaker 3: 19:40

Great. So in closing, what are some exciting things that you're working on that you'd love our listeners to know about? And then how can they find you, Jason? Sure.

Speaker 2: 19:50

So one of the things that I've been working on over the last year is extending my private practice into an online coaching practice. And I work with, uh, entrepreneurs and their businesses, uh, all over the country. I also am doing a lot more speaking engagements and workshops. So I'm available to do that, um, for companies and businesses and retreats and um, and those type of scenarios and my podcast, which has been the biggest project that I'm working on. Um, so obviously I would recommend, uh, not only listening to yours, but you know, there's also good stuff that are symbiotic, that there's enough really good information out there and you know, I'm a big fan of plugging things between your ears to drown out all the chaos and noise that unfortunately our world has out there and you don't need to be in person anymore to get good info. Um, and then down the road I'm working on, uh, a few books on mindset and kind of trip, uh, tips and tricks from the therapist that, you know, if I, if every person out there knew these 10 to 15 things, how much stress would I alleviate from their lives in different domains of their life? And that's a project I'm working on as well.

Speaker 3: 20:56

Oh, beautiful. And website.

Speaker 2: 20:58

Sure. Yeah. So website is www dot the family room s ffl, that's South Florida, abbreviated. So sfl.com, the family room sfl.com. Instagram is Jason Wasser, w a s s e R L M F T, which stands for Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist.

Speaker 3: 21:19

Wonderful. Well, Jason, thank you so much for your insights today and your wisdom and just your willingness to help others. It's very clear that you're very passionate about what you do and what you're able to bring to the table for others. And so I appreciate that, uh, because so many people are in need of some direction and guidance and just really trying to figure it all out so people like yourself and coaches bring a lot to the table for people just to kind of figure it out, navigate their way through life. And I do think that that is it. And we're all in different seasons of our lives, you know, all the time. It's always changing. And so as you navigate though that journey, you're what you might have had figured out, you're now suddenly faced with new sets of circumstances and we all go through that and we all need that sort of guidance or just sort of that navigation for dealing with things that surprise us in those new, you know, seasons of life that we're all gonna continually be making our way through. So thank you so much for all that you're doing with that.

Speaker 2: 22:20

Thank you so much for that really, really beautiful compliment and beyond flattered. And I completely agree with you that every stage of life is another layer. And if I can help someone minimize their complexities and maximize their potential and every level, I think there's more potential that we can have. And if people choose to do that work and put that effort in the life that they can have is way beyond anything they ever desired. And I definitely agree with you on what you just said, so thank you for having me on.

Speaker 3: 22:45

Oh, well thank you for being here today. And just as a friendly reminder to everyone listening so that you don't ever miss one of our great shows is subscribe to the podcast, work from Your happy place and check Jason's out because all of us as podcasters love to increase our listeners and we love people like you. We wanna bring continued great value and podcasts are a great resource that are completely free and that you can learn so much about so many different subjects. And it just, I just love it just when I'm walking, when I'm working out, it makes that time fly by so much so that I actually don't dread working out because I'm attaching it to some really great information that I'm gonna get. And that's helped me to stay on the path of working out. So that's just my little life hack if anybody needs one, because then you start gonna getting excited about, oh, what's the rest of the story today? Or who am I gonna hear today? And then it gets you on that treadmill or on that walking path or whatever it is you're doing. So that's my advice to everyone. Leave us a review. We love that. And again, Jason, thank you so much.

Speaker 2: 23:50

My absolute pleasure. I'll talk to you soon.

Speaker 4: 23:52

Thanks for joining us at Work from Your happy place. If you like what you hear, please share it with your friends and be sure to rate and review us on iTunes or Stitcher For a free gift on fighting your own happy place, please visit work from your happy place.com and click on the free audio button. Thanks again for listening.

Speaker 1: 24:12

Thanks for listening to the You Winning Life podcast. If you are ready to minimize your personal and professional struggles and maximize your potential, we would love it. If you subscribe so you don't miss an episode, you can follow us on Instagram and Facebook at Jason Wasser L M F T.